16 June 2004
Back In This Hole...
It is Wednesday today and I have returned from the dead. The moment my ass landed in this soft, high swivel chair of mine, I started "sweeping off" the tons of papers and books that spell out: Work. For a good 3 hours, I seriously focused in accomplishing my deadlines. So far, so good.
15 minutes from now and it will be lunchtime. I am still contemplating if I will be joining my colleagues or just buy something in the canteen and devour it in my work area.
What the hell is happening to me? I used to hold in high regard the firm that has accepted me from the beginning of my participation in the real workforce. But now, I felt so different. Work seems different, too. Now, it lacks the challenge and appeal that once had me hooked; Now, I also lack the enthusiasm and passion to perform and pursue the physical source of my living.
It has been 4 years. But let me clarify. I am not throwing out all these 4 years of toil. I was happy and enjoying myself in the past 3 years. There were changes but the last year was the major one. It was a drastic alteration for the work style that I had been acclimatized to. Despite my hesitation, I blindly accepted the offer. Who was I to complain when all the parties involved in the modification were all beaming and excited? It was only me who was swathed with dread.
That one year has come to pass. I have a decision to make. And so it will happen. Soon enough.